Six-Pack Abs, Yes I'll Have Some of That. And Vegas

As of today, there are 40 days until Vegas. It's all happening so sudden... 

My effort has been sub-par in my goal of a visible six pack in 60 days (see prior post.) There has not been any slacking off at the gym, but maybe I've been a little hazy about my goal for abs of steel. Now I see with amazing clarity that the clock is ticking, the alluring Vegas pools await, and this girl has got some serious work to do!

My idea of Perfection. Who needs a face with a body like that

Tips to Six-Pack Abs:

1. Lower your body fat percentage. You don't want razor sharp abs and then a layer of cushioning over them. Think more FAT LOSS instead of weight loss. I am not willing to have my body fat tested, but I know it needs to be LESS. As of today, I am able to feel my 6 pack at certain times when I am sucking my belly in and also pushing out at same time. What?! That's weird sounding- I know, just keep reading.

What helps you drop fat fast: 

A. Lift heavy stuff! weights, rocks, bears, cars - get after it!

B. Interval sprints - make-you-vomit bursts of energy

C. Intermittent fasting - this works for everything!

D. Tabata - maybe with burpees, squats, power cleans- go hard

E. High Intensity Resistance Training - go here

Nothing like a Christmas Abbott to motivate, thank you

2. Eat clean - Eating clean means different things to different folks. Are there foods which make your tummy rumble & ache? We both know what you should do, toss them. Also, bad foods (think everything that's processed) will cause your body to hold onto water weight ((B-L-O-A-T-I-N-G)) and they’re hurting your gut. If your gut isn't happy, you are not either; believe me. Happy gut = Happy life.

The opposite of motivation. His thumb should be pointed down

3. Take fish oil- Cod Liver Oil is my besty (awe, I do love you, you slimey goo of health). Fish oil helps reduce both fat and my personal enemy, inflammation. Liquid fish oil is better than capsules for your body to assimilate so ideally you want to buy the lemon flavored liquid cod liver oil. Trust me, if purchased correctly, you won’t even know you are drinking fish parts and you will not have burps (if you know what these are like, you know they are right up there with wheat grass shots). Add a smidgen of juice to yours if you really need to. 

4. Drink your water!  Three quarts a day is a jumping off point but try to exceed that for good measure. You can’t flush the fat without a medium to flush it. Also, water can be a sentimental support friend you lean on when in need. Serious. Water can fill you up when your evil self is considering those foods you usually waiver against. As an experiment, I dare you to consecutively chug 3 large glasses of water & then think about eating...anything...at...all. It can't be done - you will be too full of h20 to consume even one chia seed. Try it, I dare you.

5. Work out like you effing mean it. My favorite part, I got this! Focus on compound exercises that will use the whole body and also burn calories after you strut out of the gym.Think thrusters, snatches, overhead squats - all fun, heart pounding movements that beat standard cardio to a bloody pulp. Just make sure the movements are done fast & you aren't wasting time meandering during reps. Go hard, go fast & turn up your beast mode playlist. Get your playlist right here

I bet she has a six pack under there!

Also, I personally pledge to be doing a butt-load of toes to bar, knees to elbow & V-Ups for the next 40 days.That's going to build confidence in my bashful 6-pack and prepare it for its premier party in Sin City. That and because toes to bar are my psychotic idea of a damn good time. As in, if toes to bar is there, then the party is on!

Promise to keep you updated & take pics of my progress!

This was when I had 60 days left to Vegas, tic toc

Avoid Giving Rough High-Fives! Proper Care & Feeding of Your Fabulous Ten! With Video Tutorial

Oh, your hands live a rough life with barbells and pull up bars. Let’s get your money-makers ready for soft hand shakes and non-revengeful high-fives.

It’s annoying to rip your hands and it's more annoying to listen to someone whine about their ripped hands. Yes, your hands WILL demand r-e-s-p-e-c-t (singing it right now) especially when you begin to push them to their limits. Pull ups, barbells and ropes will take down burly men if their hands give out first. These tricks will prevent you from ripping, thus no whining. What we're going to do is to shave down the skin that is on top of your calluses (surprise! you don't need it) There is nothing brutal about this, there should be no pain or tears involved if you do it exactly as I tell you. 

Your Hand-Care tool kit should include: 

1. Tweezerman callus shaver which you can purchase at Walgreens or here: 

Buy me to prevent painful rips!

How to Use the Tweezerman:

1. Apply lotion to your hands and let it dry. Usually 2 minutes.

                                      2. Grab the shaver by handle. 

3. Hold the shaver to your palm with the razor tip above the calluses. Shave in 

    slow, downward strokes towards the bottom of your hand. Apply a 

    reasonable amount of pressure to make sure the blade gets to the 

    skin. Shave only parallel to your fingers to avoid hurting yourself. 

    To help you navigate this, I am showing you the starting point in this pic and sending my youtube video

Start with shaver here

Remember the Tweezerman when you know your WOD will include ferocious amounts of pull ups (You know who you are, Murph!) As for regular maintenance, try shaving down once a week for good measure. Your hands will send their deepest gratitude.

2. A pumice stone.

These come in all shapes and sizes & in this instance, size does not matter :) Use this guy when your fingers and hands are getting mangey. Sometimes, I use this just when I notice  my hands are feeling rough and I can do this really fast in the shower. Outside the shower, you can use a bowl for water & let your hand(s) sit in there a few minutes to soften first (just like a pedicure). Next, scrub fingers/palms back and forth in all directions with the pumice stone. Lastly, apply some lotion, vitamin E or olive oil and Wa-La; you regain that sexy hand luster. 

In case you do rip/tear!! First you want to wash the yuck off your hands to get them clean. You will feel the burn, sorry, no way around it. Then, my Best advice EVER…get the blue latex doctor gloves & put those bad boys on before your shower. They will allow you to wash with soap & not suffer further with burning pain.

I like to put these on & ask my closest friends to bend over

PLAYLIST For Unleashing Your Inner Beast, you're welcome

Often times, I credit my IPOD for my killer work outs and I realize I might be completely lost without my ear buds cranking out some audio motivation. So maybe I should share my secret inner-demon music? Enjoy, and welcome to BEAST MODE: 

1. Martin Garrix, Animals (you tube here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gCYcHz2k5x0&feature=kp)
2. Muse, Uprising (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w8KQmps-Sog)
3. Utah Saints - Lost Vagueness mix (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yw0CTq8u-8o)
4. Felix the housecat & Benny Bennasi (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JM9AaRW0FL4)
5. Awolonation - Sail (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gH2efAcmBQM)
6. The Neighbourhood - Sweater Weather (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GCdwKhTtNNw)
7. KIngs of Leon - CLoser (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eg3F4zpOdK8)
8. DJ Kee - Eat, Sleep,Rave, Repeat (gotta hit up ITunes)
9. Icona Pop - I Love It (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6K0iUo5nDY0)
10. Benny Bennasi & The Biz - Love is gonna save us (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oVz0IM4i2dg)
11. Katy Perry - Dark Horse (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0KSOMA3QBU0)
12. Kevin Rudolf & Lil Wayne - Let It Rock (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u0n4eMGXAyk)
13. Macklemore & Ryan Lewis  -White Walls (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8PLifPUIuic)
14. Tiesto - Carpe Noctum (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W3aeOGXMwxM)
15. Zombie Nation- Kernkraft 400 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eYJP93wQ7lM)

ALWAYS looking for more songs to kick up the intensity of my work outs, so please help by posting comments with killer songs or sending an email: stephkinzer@gmail.com. Thanks for reading, you rock!

Tree hugging

Call me a freak (no, don't) but I found myself hugging an ash tree yesterday for ten minutes. Recently, I was told that I need some grounding and I took it very seriously. Decided to skip over the why, how and all the the "why- me" drama, and decided to just act. I can't say the experience of hugging a tree was life altering but it was very positive. And I felt better after I got intimate with some bark, so... meh. My research came later and here is what I found.

Not Being Grounded/Centered

(not what your parent's used to do to you when you were a bad kid)

• Caring too much of what others think of you and over thinking (guilty)
• Self-talk is less than kind - yes, downright rude self talk 
• Scattered, unfocused thoughts/emotions
• Not living in the present moment
• Feeling unsatisfied in a lot of aspects of daily life
• Feeling "done" or drained emotionally or physically
  
  
  
  

  
  

Quick Solutions to Ground You:
1. Stand on the earth, walk in grass or dirt
2. Have a good belly laugh
3. Mentally become a tree with feet that "root" into the earth
4. Hug a tree - (done!)
5. Meditate 
6. Give up your first born child as a sacrifice...WHAT??!!

Hope this helps, may we all be so lucky as to hug a piece of mother earth. There, done endorsing tree-hugging hippies...

New gyms and older sisters!

A welcome twist in my work outs today, by adding a work out partner, my big sister, Wendy! We were able to lift some IRON at her gym in Boulder, Colorado Athletic Club. The club was friendly enough to allow my entry; no membership, no problem.

So, I'll admit, there was a tiny splash of trepidation in going to a new gym. Where are the boxes, why does their TRX system look funny, look at all these new faces, no water to drink anywhere... oh the how the mind easily creates unnecessary chaos! It's good for us to experience new places instead of just getting too used to our safe, daily grind.

WOD,  included with intense chick-talk-time:
Back squats/front squats (95#)
Deadlifts (up to 195#)
Jumping lunges
Toes to bar - Wendy's very 1st time, so lots of laughing & silly child-like swinging behavior
Plank holds & push ups

The reason there are no numbers listed for reps on the WOD is that I couldn't keep counting since we were too busy talking. Yes, we were those annoying girls who were hogging the weights & gossiping too much instead of lifting. But you have to be those people sometimes so you won't judge as harshly when it's someone else doing the same annoying thing you were. The chick time was awesome, I feel a ton of gratitude for having a great sister, everyone should have a Wendy!

1st WOD:
2000M Row, then run track with handstand p/u practice
3 rounds:
25 Wall Balls  @ 10lbs, 12#,14# (move up in weight with each round)
Pistols with TRX - 6 on stronger leg & 8 on the Right (throwing 'ol right leg under the bus)
20 Weighted sit ups
4 Rounds:
9 Clean/jerk 85#
15 Push ups

Trying not to reach my physical breaking point. I wanted to feel refreshed after my work out instead of exhausted & I did that - Yeah! However, I did get a gnarly bruise on my collarbone from the clean/jerks. This seems part of the routine anymore, my skin is becoming really sensitive...is it jealous of my muscle's new strength so it's decided to start acting out for attention?  More on this to come...

The new BIG man in my life, The Michelin Man

The Michelin man has arrived in my back yard with a furry…and now we just can’t stay away from each other. What can I say - he loves how I man-handle him. This is going to be fun!!

Things you do with a tractor tire:

Since tractors are not that useful in Denver county...
1. Tire flips - welcome beast mode
2. Sledge hammer hits - pound it like you mean it
3. Strap a rope to it & pull it
4. Box jumps
5. Jumping in & Out of it - think SPEED
6. Carry it over your head (not quite there yet)

Flip that Heavy Beast!

Sooooo…. I flipped a 450# tire today! (Now imagine I just said that casually with a nonchalant wave of my hand) I flipped that monster & I want more (maybe not RIGHT now…)

Strong woman class today. Heck yes. My tired little self loved every working second. The strong women and I enjoyed pulling a tire uphill, hitting a tire with a sledge hammer, 40# weighted push ups, shot put throws & heavy (88#) kettle bell swings.

Anyone have advice on Russian KB swings? I look mostly retarded when I don’t fully extend into American style. Even my trainer was a little dismayed by my form. And there I was, all alone humping air with some kinda odd double hip extension. Not feeling like a roaring lion during this part of the workout, no sir.

THIS was NOT me today

Am I extending my hips now?

Strong woman class + today's WOD:

3X
Run 3 laps - 350meters? 
500m Row
5 handstands (practice to keep my feet off the wall)
15 kettlebell thrusters 20# each hand
15 box jumps (24”)
20 weighted sit ups

Uh…no wonder. That WOD explains the intense draw towards this girl needing a nice comfortable chair to sit down and eat massive carbs. Oh basic needs, how I will never get away from you.

Even though it was hard today, I still affirm that 14.5 grew more hair on my chest, I am still haunted by all those mean-nurtured thrusters.