Wednesday, March 5, 2014

ROARING Out of The Box, Shrinking Boobs & Heavy(ish) Power Cleans

Out of the Box…This girl’s journey without crossfit, Hollar! I'm going rogue. My hybrid, semi custom- made workouts without the box. 3.2.1 go

Today at the gym included shrinking boobs, heavy-ish power cleans and a stench of major proportions. My morning began at the early 4 am hour. WTH is going on here, almost two hours premature, and wide awake, all be, even my alarm is offended. Either way, made it to the car and I'm good as gold.

So when I did make it to the dungeon gym at Colorado Athletic Club (which I have come to have a mutually loving relationship with) I started off strong, forgetting to stretch, yet AGAIN. Hopefully it never bites me in the arse with an injury, neh.  Lately, I have been starting with a bang, running upstairs in the midget track and adding rowing or kettlebells.

 But wait, what about the shrinking boobs  you ask? Right, let’s get down to business.
After the warm up, I headed to the barbell, YAY. I love you barbell, you rock my world. Unfortunately my usual work station is facing a mirror which gives one way too much vanity time. Today, this vanity time let me see that my particular semi-voluptuous nature seemed to be suffering from shrinkage. What can testosterone do to you? I crush you estrogen dominance, muah ha. What was once a T & A body has now evolved towards an A body with um, tic tacs. (Tic Tacs and Ass??) As I am trying to focus on my lifts I am distracted by this epiphany, but aspiring to be the humble badas I want to be, I push on.
What we have here is my WOD:
8 rounds
3 power cleans (95lbs)
9 push ups
9 air squats

My lifts felt strong today and my face felt gloriously sweaty, success! Back to the minus T issue, I have been thinking of how I could make a deal with the devil to save my bouncy girls; What would I give the devil to trade? My cocker spaniel? But as the shock has worn off, I realize I am making peace with whatever my body needs to do. Besides,  there’s always surgery right? Hehe, that’s not at all drastic.

My workout ended with a short trip the rower just for one last hurrah before my departure.  This is where I made one hell of a mistake. Never, ever do this  when you are in the company of others. I removed  my IPOD arm band, (I just squinted remembering this) Yes. I did that. And I know of one lucky personal trainer who also partook in the heavenly aroma. Oh the stench of sweaty balls. Yes, that's what a few weeks (months?) worth of arm sweat added up to. So now I know I should be washing that naughty arm band more often.  OK, we covered power cleans, boobs and stench.  Stay tuned for a joke on my next post. Until then, send the devil my way, will ya?