Thursday, April 9, 2015

Self-Confidence Pep Talk Plus Instant Confidence Builders

First I need to start with reiterating that we are all beautiful (you know you are!) Each human body is a unique work of art - that includes ALL your cellulite, stretch marks, scars, moles, bald spots, your smaller left foot, your love handles, your lopsided ears- all of it makes each of us uniquely perfect. None of us is singularly perfect in every way! I place a lot of blame on the billion-dollar beauty industry for making us strive for an unobtainable level of perfection while they reap in massive monetary funds. I have learned the most beautiful thing on a person is their happiness. And happiness is not fleeting, and it is something that can not be taken away from you.

Please remember to read this when you start to feel down about yourself and let the tears fall if they may! 

One day I remember very well, I was feeling really down and sorry for myself because of my ample scars and stretch marks (my skin has not adapted very well to my life experiences). So I was feeling so gross about myself and just felt down and yuck. On this one day, I saw a guy being pushed in a wheel chair who had no arms and no legs. What a kick to the gut that was! Do you think that guy would take my scar-covered body and trade with me? You think he would say no to my legs because they have stretch marks on them? Hell no. With legs, I can walk, I can lift weights, I can run for miles and feel the endorphin rush, I can do so much - scars or not!

Let's talk BIG PICTURE here. Try not to focus on what our body looks like, but instead on what our bodies can DO. How can your body perform? Does your body give you the ability to give someone a big bear hug? Can you climb up a mountain? Can you snuggle in with a warm cup of coffee and a book on your day off work? Can you feel rain drops fall onto the tip of your nose? Oh man, just Let the mountains be beautiful. Let me just feel the experience, and let that be enough.

We put so much pressure on ourselves to look a certain way and think of where else that energy could go. All this pressure just to feel comfortable in our own skin. Could you refocus all that energy towards your career or towards loving a child? Could you end your insecurities and channel it towards competitive weight training? Could you train to learn a new skill? Parkour? YES! Could your potential in all things become limitless? What if focusing on our imperfections is just a distraction, small time stuff to keep us from looking at the whole picture and reaching our potential. What if you decided to accept (or even to love) your differences instead of giving them any more power over you. Where could you be?

My last point: How does it make you feel? Of all the thoughts and emotions that play out inside your head everyday; when you think negatively about any part of your body - do you feel good? Oh. Hell. No. Can you change it so you can start to feel good? Hell yes! Can you look at yourself in the mirror and instead of saying "I hate my stretch marks" Maybe you could instead say, "My stretch marks are mine, they show when my body got stronger." And how can I look at my body and dislike it after all it's done for me?  And you know what, a tidbit. If you aren't bothered by your imperfections, then why would anyone else need to be? When I put on a pair of shorts or a swim suit, I like to think "imperfections be damned, I'm going to have such a good time that no one (including myself) will need to be bothered by my scar marks."

What's the antidote to needing perfection? It's all about happiness! It's all about the way you handle what you were given. It's the way you walk into a room and chose not to be a wall flower and instead you greet people with warmth and confidence; own that room! And Maya Angelou said it perfectly when she said,

“I've learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.” - Maya Angelou

When you're all wrapped up in thoughts of yourself, where is there room for other people? When you're focus is internal, it almost separates you from the world, it puts up a barrier that need not exist. It isolates you and encourages addictive, self-sabotaging behavior. You have to pull yourself out of that world of self criticism. Welcome a new you with new, loving thoughts that put you in a happy place.

This topic is sooooo tender and dear to my heart. It is something I struggle with regularly. I don't have the permanent solution, I just know that I have to keep working on it. There are times I get down about the way I look and there are others where I feel like a million bucks. It's important to remember your worth is not based on what you look like, or even what you wished you looked like. You're special and worthy just because you are you, and that's always enough.   ~~ Lots of love and tons of big hugs to all! ~~

My happy place, with my Michelin Man

Increase your Confidence RIGHT NOW:
  1. Pick up a barbell - put it over your head if you can. Overhead squats, clean and Jerks, snatches.
  2. Strengthen your solar plexus chakra
  3. Power Poses
  4. Increase your testosterone 

Did I hit the spot? Are you feeling ~Inspired ~ and needing some more self love? A great post here, a Love Your Body Challenge