Gratitude, Reflection and Pause on Thanksgiving. RIP Justin.

A great man left this world on Monday. Justin, a friend and one hell of a person passed away this week. He was my girlfriend's brother and I ache for his loss as well as his family's. The questions in my mind have been rolling out by the moment; how did it happen, who was there, what were the circumstances? But in the end, the answers to those questions won't change the fact that he is gone now. The answers to those questions won't let him sit down and eat Thanksgiving dinner today. The answers won't let him take more breaths or hold his nephew and niece.

At a time when you experience loss, I find it important that we allow time for serious, focused reflection in our own lives. Are we where we want to be and doing the things we want? Are we living a life to be proud of, one that makes our ancestors and loved ones proud of us? Are we being true to ourselves? Are we cherishing each precious moment or are we just moseying around in life without being present and relishing in the joy of now.

So on a day when my heart aches for such a terrible loss, and on a day when tears and hugs can not ease the pain - I wish to be grateful for the moment I live in now. Here is what I am grateful for on Thanksgiving:

My Graditude List for Thanksgiving 2014

1. My two daughters; a walking example of living in the moment and who teach me to relish the small things in life. Yesterday at Whole Foods, we found the bubble button where the kids can push the button and bubbles fall from the ceiling. My girls you would have thought had just met Santa and the easter bunny - they screeched and smiled bigger than I've ever seen as they tried to pop the bubbles and let them fall on their heads. Those moments of pure joy will be etched in my mind forever and it's my privilege to be surrounded by two girls that can offer that joy to me. I'm a lucky Mom.
   
2. For a hubby who can keep me focused and on track when I start slipping. Rick is my rock - how he can always stay on track with my crazy shenanigans astounds me regularly. He has always been able to see the big picture- when I can sometimes only see one step ahead somehow he sees the stars. He has amazing clarity. And it is Rick who can make me laugh as hard as my Dad does- and that's no easy task.
   
   
   
   
3. For the ability to LOVE and to FEEL LOVE. Also for the ability to breath and have control of my body. The ability to feel raw emotions no matter how good or bad.
   
4. For being blessed in a body that let's me do the things I love. And a body that has dealt with years of mistreatment and too much judgment. A body that let's me learn new skills. Our bodies are amazing machines I am honored to be able to tap into its abilities.

And for today, on Thanksgiving, it's my goal to enjoy each moment, live inside each moment and give big tight hugs to those I love. To eat and not feel guilt about the foods I chose to enjoy. To get subsistence from the people I will be surrounded by today instead of trying to get it  from food. Keeping food as the "icing on the cake" and letting my loved ones be my cake. Happy Turkey Day, make a it good one folks!